Sometimes, when your children don’t appreciate your advice, you bring your decades of wisdom to the streets of the nation’s capital to help others. That’s what 78-year-old Tamara Miller is doing.
Miller is one of 15 Jewish elders taking to Washington, D.C., for Sixth & I’s new “What Would Bubbe Do?” initiative in mid-September. The bubbes will be stationed at advice stands across the District to answer pedestrians’ questions and queries.
“Our goal is to make Judaism feel more accessible around this time and meet people where they are in the community and bring the magic of bubbes out into the streets at a time when I feel like people could use a little bit of extra joy,” Michelle Eider, Sixth & I’s director of marketing and communications, said.
“They bring a really interesting range of life experiences,” she said of the bubbes, who run the gamut from licensed therapists and former teachers to “armchair experts.”
Esther Foer, a D.C. resident and grandmother of eight, is one of the participating bubbes.
“I hesitate to give my own grandchildren advice,” said Foer, whose grandchildren range in age from one to 20 years old. “I wait for them to ask for it. … I don’t want to be overbearing. But here we [have] a chance to be a bubbe to some other people.”
She joined the initiative to support the synagogue’s programming, having previously served as Sixth & I’s executive director for 10 years.
“The opportunity to reach people in new ways, that’s what Sixth & I is about,” Foer said. “For me, the bubbe thing is a whole new role there, but why not?”
“Over the years, Sixth & I has thought of creative ways to go beyond the walls of our space to meet people where they are,” Eider said, adding that the D.C. synagogue debuted the city’s first kosher deli on wheels.
“We were thinking about a way to do something like that again,” she said. “Advice stands just felt like something that’s timeless in our culture, thinking of everything from Lucy’s psychiatry booth in ‘Charlie Brown’ to the popularity of those man-on-the-street TikTok videos today.”
The timing of the initiative overlaps with some of the most meaningful holidays on the Jewish calendar.
“Doing [‘What Would Bubbe Do?’] leading up to High Holidays really felt like an opportune time as people are thinking about how they want to show up in the new year,” Eider said. “We were thinking about themes of repair and repentance.”
Each advice stand will include suggested prompts for people chatting with a bubbe.
Questions include “What’s a regret you want to let go of?”, “What’s something keeping you up at night?”, “What’s a positive change you want to make?”, “Who’s someone you need to make amends with?” and “What’s a decision you’re struggling to make?”
“But, of course, people are welcome to go off script as well,” Eider said.
In line with the theme, Foer said she plans to discuss “how to move forward, how to let go of regrets, how to enjoy being Jewish in whatever way they participate and to go for it in the new year” with passersby.
Foer will also offer something she feels is crucial in today’s age: a listening ear.
“I’ll give [people] an opportunity to say what’s on their mind,” Foer said. “And given everything happening in our country and the Jewish world, people have a lot on their minds. From my perspective, it’s not about being judgmental; it’s about listening.”
She’ll give passersby a chance to share what concerns them, as sharing one’s thoughts with someone can be cathartic.
Eider spoke to the value of getting to chat with a grandmotherly figure, noting that the initiative isn’t limited to Jewish folks.
“Not everyone is lucky enough to have a bubbe in their life, and there’s something that’s really meaningful about tapping into the collective wisdom of a generation that not everyone might have access to,” Eider said.
“I don’t even know how much time I’ll spend with an individual,” Foer said. “I’ll do the best I can.”
