Rabbi Bentzy Stolik believes that one doesn’t have to be a rabbi to make a difference.
“We all have a sense of influence on our surroundings in places that rabbis never could,” Stolik said. “We all should adopt a little bit of this mindset of being ready to look out for others, inviting others to Shabbat dinner, … be there to raise the bar of Jewish life for each other.”
This sense of community was instilled in Stolik as a young child, when his parents opened their Brooklyn home to neighbors who wanted to learn about Judaism. Stolik has continued strengthening the community; he and his wife moved from Brooklyn to Maryland in 2012 to found Chabad of Olney, the “most rewarding work.”
Before this role, he spent his summers visiting and serving Jewish communities around the world as a rabbinic intern.
Stolik lives with his wife, Devorah, and their nine children, who range in age from just under 1 year old to nearly 14.
Tell me about your Jewish upbringing and background.
I was born and raised in Crown Heights, Brooklyn. That’s the cradle of the Chabad movement here in America. From my earliest childhood, it was a community that I think was influenced by the glow of the late Lubavitcher Rebbe and his work. Although I didn’t grow up in this Chabad house environment, it was a religious community; my home was an open home. We had a constant flow of visitors, people that were looking to explore Judaism. We even had a little sign on our front door that called it the “Stolik Chabad House.” Many of [our visitors] would come back regularly, so we referred to them as extended family. For us, it wasn’t just a family Chanukah party; it was also one for extended family, people who’ve become regulars at Shabbat.
Why did you choose Olney?
It’s beshert, you know; it’s like a match. We were exploring. My wife and I are committed to living our lives dedicated to Chabad activity and work, and Olney came our way.
What do you like about Olney’s Jewish community?
Olney’s independent-natured. It’s a strong community of its own, apart from the hub of the busier parts of Montgomery County, and it’s fertile ground. There’s a lot of Jewish life here, but there’s so much more potential. It’s a perfect community for the continued expansion and development of Jewish life.
What does a day in your life look like?
No two days are the same. The variety of work here that I’m involved with ranges from teaching and preparing for Hebrew school class, planning a teen club, preparing a class for our adult education series, working on the logistics of a holiday event coming up, answering life cycle questions and needs.
What do you want your kids to learn from you?
The question is “What am I going to learn from my kids?” They’re my best teachers. They watch everything that goes on here. They have their opinions about what goes on, where my speeches were kind of flat, and things of that nature. I think with them growing up in this environment of a welcoming community, their youth is shaped by a sense of responsibility to our community and to others.
One of the teachings where inspiration comes from the Rebbe’s writings and letters and talks [is] being a lamplighter, which means being ready to be there to help people [who] have the resources; they just need a little further inspiration to help them get to where they want to get.
Who inspires you?
[From] my adult life as a student in yeshiva, I’ll share two individuals who inspired me in the path of true dedication to the Jewish community, two Chabad shluchim. One was from my time in Mumbai, India, for one summer. We were brought down by Rabbi Gabi and Rivky Holtzberg, may they rest in peace; they were murdered in the terror attack in 2008. They were then dealing with a tremendous amount of personal family stresses, children with terminal illness, flying in and out of the country to deal with that. At the same time, they were completely selfless, as much as they were available. It wasn’t like, “Don’t you know what I’m going through?” but “I’m here to serve” with a humble selflessness.
I spent a couple weeks before Passover in a suburb of Montreal many years ago. As a student, I was brought down to assist in their Big Matzah Project. They were delivering their matzah to 8,000 local Jewish homes, and each one was hand-delivered with a team of local volunteers. The passion and the excitement of the shluchim, the Chabad rabbi and his wife overseeing this project, [was inspiring]. To them, we’re here to serve every member of the community. Whether they’re engaged, whether they’re affiliated or not, that sense of responsibility and doing that with excitement and passion has left a mark. And I said, “I want more of this. This is what I want to be like.”
