Stephanie Ben Simon’s job has taken her from her native New Jersey to Atlanta, Georgia; Oakland, California; Westchester, New York; and, most recently, Bedford Corners, New York. Now, she is hoping that she can call Fairfax home.
Temple B’nai Shalom in Fairfax Station is the fifth school where Ben Simon, 39, has worked as director, a position she began on July 1. She holds a bachelor’s degree in Judaic studies, a master’s in Jewish education from the Jewish Theological Seminary and has 13 years of experience in education administration. Ben Simon lives in Oakton, Maryland, with her husband and 5-year-old son.
Tell me about your Jewish upbringing and background.
I grew up in central New Jersey — yes, I believe that central New Jersey exists — in a pretty observant Reform household. I was very involved; I grew up at the JCC, where I went to preschool. I was a camp counselor; I was on the swim team. I was bat mitzvahed and went through confirmation; I personally wasn’t super into being Jewish until I ended up in Israel for my second semester of junior year of high school on a program that is now called URJ Heller High.
What was it like being in Israel that semester?
It was a somewhat unusual semester; we were there in 2002 during part of the Second Intifada. It was a life-changing experience for me. It went from ‘What is this Judaism?’ to ‘Wow, this is really cool; I love this.’ I love learning about my history and my heritage and understanding the greater picture of where I sit in the history of Judaism and the world, and it created an amazing network for me of new friends — people I became extremely close to until this day.
A lot of your jobs relate to learning and education. Why do you do the work you do?
I love that Reform Judaism believes in choice through knowledge. I’m really passionate about connecting the next generation of Jews to their history and being excited and loving all the positives [of being] Jewish. It can be very difficult sometimes to be Jewish, and I like to bring all the positive happiness and excitement that goes along with it to combat some of those antisemitic, ugly and difficult conversations we have to have.
There’s so much meaning and purpose and excitement in Judaism; lots of celebration. Every month, we have a holiday. Every month, there’s something to celebrate. Something in Judaism that’s really special is that even in moments of happiness, we remember the sadness. Even in moments of sadness, we remember the happiness. I love the balance. I love how it gives us the framework to be excellent global citizens and productive members of society.
And then when the kids get older, some of the [Jewish] text is difficult, and the kids can really grapple with it. It’s OK, and we encourage you, actually, to grapple with it. One of my favorite things is when kids get to be much older and they learn the actual ending of Purim, not that it’s a positive and exciting thing, but for them to talk about ‘why do we have this and why do we continue to learn it and talk about it and deal with it?’
Why is Jewish studies important to you?
It’s kind of who we are, how we got to this point, understanding how we fit into this world. I think it’s no surprise to me that comparative Judaism, comparative religion are very popular among kids because all we want to do is learn about who we are and how we fit in with the world around us. That’s one of the really exciting pieces: understanding ourselves and how we fit into the world around us.
The majority of my job is the K-12 program. I also touch upon adult education, so I do cradle-to-grave. And that’s my favorite because every stage of life has something really different and interesting and authentic to connect to Judaism.
How do you use your Judaic studies degree in your work today?
My Judaic studies degree plays a big role in what I do, not always on a day-to-day basis, but the hope of the job is that I learned and studied all of these different things so that we can have a really robust curriculum in our school and educational programming and offerings that we have for our families. I just pull [from] classes that I took and continue education that I’ve had to constantly refresh, renew and amplify.
What do you like best about Northern Virginia’s Jewish community so far?
One thing that I really love about Judaism is the way that it gives us the guidelines for how to lead a really rich and fulfilling life. I love that the idea of a minyan is a minimum of 10 people; when things are tough, when things are bad, when things are good, it elevates what’s happening. I think that minyan of 10, that idea of having a community is so important. I’m so excited to be here in Virginia where we have a really rich community in which we’ll be able to raise our son so that he can not only feel excited about his Judaism but pride in who he is and where he came from.
