‘Girls’ Season 3, Episode 7 Recap: ‘Beach House’

Jessica Miglio/HBO

Shit. Just. Got. Real.

One of the noticeable qualities this season of Girls has had is, aside from the first two episodes and Hannah’s birthday, none of them have really been hanging out together as pals. And if they have, it’s because of an event Marnie threw together or because Jessa was acting as a professional scum human being in rehab. While viewing this stellar third season, the question that has been in the back of my mind (and I’m sure many viewer’s minds) is whether or not the girls actually even like each other anymore.

Last night’s “Beach House” finally presented the idea of where each girl stands with each other in terms of friendship. And boy, was the fallout simultaneously excruciating and brilliant. Of course, Marnie came up with the idea to set up a weekend getaway for the fab four at her mother’s friend’s beach house in North Fork (totally not the Hamptons, you guys). All season, Marnie has really been a quiet mess, a ticking time bomb who wanted support from her friends after her nasty breakup with Charlie.

Instead of just going there to have a good time like the other girls wanted, Marnie planned out a schedule involving fancy meals, “healing time” at dinner to talk about feelings and assigning everyone bedrooms. Thankfully, this was interrupted by the long-awaited reappearance of Elijah! He, his new beau and two other gay theater friends emerged from the docks, comparing some girl in an American Apparel bikini to a Spring Breakers character, only to realize it was Hannah.


Luckily, the ex-couple and roommates decided to not remain estranged and Hannah invited the rowdy group to the house, much to Marnie’s displeasure. Drunken antics ensued, which involved learning a choreographed dance, skinny dipping and eating Marnie’s duck, which she was super proud of. Still though, she was upset that Elijah and co. decided to wear out their welcome, but really, she was upset that the weekend wasn’t the bonding, “let’s reconnect again” experience she wanted it to be.

It was clear that the girls have had deep-seated issues with each other for some time, and thankfully, drunk Shoshanna was there to bring everything to the forefront. Shosh has really always been my favorite character on this show, and when I’ve said she’s been underused lately, it’s also a direct parallel to her relationship with the other girls. None of them truly take her seriously, and she finally called everyone out on their shit, starting with Hannah.

“Seriously, I have never met anyone who thinks their life is so fucking fascinating,” she told Hannah. “I wanted to fall asleep in my own vomit all day listening to you talk about how you bruise more easily than other people.”

This set off a heated argument between all four of them, with jabs being taken at Marnie’s sense of entitlement, strive for unrealistic perfection and her complaining, Hannah’s selfishness, Jessa’s many issues and Shoshanna’s lack of intelligence (they said it, not me). The end result? I’m not so sure. The next morning, they silently cleaned the house, and the episode ended with them waiting for a bus back to the city, while silently attempting the choreography from the night before, which Marnie had said wasn’t perfect enough. Again, I’m not sure what this was supposed to mean. Possibly them working on rebuilding their friendships, which have become victims of their selfish desires and first-world problems? I’m guessing the rest of the season will bring this to the forefront.

Stray hairs

– Again, I’m quite pleased that Andrew Rannels is back on the show as Elijah. He’s just as messed up as Hannah, albeit in a different way, as it was revealed his boyfriend is kind of an asshole to him and he kind of just puts up with it. Also, Hannah and Elijah heart to hearts are always the best.

– “Old man Ray?” Kudos to Elijah’s theater friend for immediately connecting the dots and pointing out that Marnie and Ray are having sex.

– Jessa had no shame in trying to flirt with naked theater guy in the pool, who was also kind of awful: “I spent $80,000 on a theater BFA. Of course, I’m talented.” Please.

–  “Jessa goes to rehab for five fucking seconds and we have to listen to everything she comes up with?” “Oh my god, can you chill the fuck out about dinner? Seriously, that duck tasted like a used condom and I want to forget about it.” We need more drunk Shoshanna.

– The writers really went all out in eviscerating Charlie, didn’t they? According to Marnie, their breakup involved him cleaning out his stuff from her apartment, with a friend from work, and telling her “I never loved you,” while she had made him wood-grilled pizza. OMG. Also, Charlie’s business went under and according to Elijah, he’s probably gay.

– Does anyone want to try and learn that dance number with me?


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